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![Deadly Illusions [2021] ★](https://tlkabtmovies.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/04/deadly_illusions_ver2-1.jpg?w=510)
Deadly Illusions [2021] ★
In the 90’s, a movie like “Deadly Illusions” would have gone straight to cable TV. In 2021, a movie like “Deadly Illusions” should have went straight to trash. It baffles me that a movie like this one even exists. It baffles me that a group of people got together to make this preposterous “erotic” thriller.…
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Cuties [2020] ★
Believe everything being said about this movie, and consider this a public service announcement: “Cuties” is difficult to watch and even more difficult to defend. I don’t usually mind “cautionary tales”, but there is nothing cautionary about this film. The backlash started when a clip from the movie was shared on social media, showing a…
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Artemis Fowl [2020] ★
To say that “Artemis Fowl” is Disney’s worst movie in years would truly be the understatement of the year. Having been delayed several times before it ultimately ended up on Disney +, the movie was doomed to fail right from the start. But I wanted to give it a chance, especially with Kenneth Branagh directing.…
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365 Days [2020] ★
Think of every bad movie you’ve seen (including the preposterous “50 Shades” trilogy), dig deeper and there you’ll find “365 Days”, a film so atrocious and so stupid, it shouldn’t be allowed to exist in this day and age. A truly awful Michele Morrone plays Massimo, a member of the Sicilian mafia family who has…
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The Wrong Missy [2020] ★
Wow. Where do I begin? I may have just witnessed the worst movie of the decade so far (“Like A Boss”, you’re off the hook). This lazy, painfully unfunny comedy starring David Spade and Lauren Lapkus will have you cringing for 90 minutes (if you can make it to the finish line). Spade plays a…
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Coffee & Kareem [2020] ★
Netflix’s “Coffee & Kareem” is only 88 minutes long (including the credits). So why on earth does it feel like an endurance test? It has none of the qualities of a decent comedy, and it’s a long way from Ed Helms’ “The Hangover”. He plays a police officer who teams up with the loudest kid…
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Secret Obsession [2019] ★
Yet another preposterous Netflix thriller about a young woman who returns home following an accident that almost ended her life. She can’t remember who she was or how she ended up here, so it’s up to her husband to reintroduce her to her life. If you can’t figure out where this movie is going from…
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6 Underground [2019] ★
Michael Bay directs this disastrous action movie, now streaming on Netflix. If this isn’t enough to turn you off, then I’ll go on. Not since the last “Transformers” clusterfuck have I felt the need to shout at the screen in anger. “I want my money back!”. Luckily for us, this never received a theatrical release,…
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Like A Boss [2020] ★
This painfully unfunny comedy, courtesy of Miguel Arteta, is easily the worst film of the decade so far. Tiffany Haddish and Rose Byrne are wasted as Bffs who run a small, local cosmetics company. Enter Claire Luna (Salma Hayek, so bad), a giant in the industry who offers to cover their huge debts, as long…
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Polaroid [2019] ★
This stinker of a horror movie is one of the worst things you’ll see this year. Following in the footsteps of two of the worst horror films of the decade (that would be “Flatliners” and “Slender Man”, just in case), “Polaroid” focuses on a high school loner who finds a polaroid camera at an antique…
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Serenity [2019] ★
Behold. This preposterous thriller starring Matthew McConaughey and Anne Hathaway is the year’s worst movie so far. I say that with disappointment because it had potential. And I admit: it had me going for a few minutes, up until a ridiculous turn of events that made no sense whatsoever. Let me start from the beginning:…
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Slender Man [2018] ★
It’s 2018 and movies like “Slender Man” still exist on the big screen. This truly horrible horror movie shouldn’t even exist on DVD. But here we are, on a hot summer day, watching this preposterous film…on the big screen. Why? Why waste a perfectly decent budget on a movie that: 1) isn’t scary at all.…
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Fifty Shades Freed [2018] ★
Think of every bad movie I’ve ever reviewed on this blog. Way below that is “Fifty Shades of Grey” and its sequel “Fifty Shades Darker”. Then there’s 50,000 feet of horse shit. Dig another 100,000 feet until you hit rock bottom and there you will find “50 Shades Freed”, a sequel so stupid and so…
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Insidious: The Last Key [2018] ★
It’s Still January, but “Insidious: The Last Key” could well be the worst movie of the year. There are no scares in this fourth installment, only leftovers from its much superior predecessors. As a direct sequel to the third film (which in turn was a prequel to the first two), “The Last Key” focuses once…
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Amityville: The Awakening [2017] ★
In a genre that suffers from extreme tiredness, filmmakers like James Wan are still delivering solid scares with such movies as “The Conjuring” and “Insidious”. Not the case with “Amityville: The Awakening”, a dreadful “kind-of-a” sequel to the 1979 movie. Even the actors make fun of the 2005 remake, unaware that the movie they’re in…
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Flatliners [2017] ★
It’s the end of the summer, a time where some studios start preparing for Oscar season, while others dump their summer leftovers. Case in point: “Flatliners”, a truly awful thriller (if we can call it that), that ranks among the worst films of the year. A remake of a 1990 movie directed by Joel Schumacher,…
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Death Note [2017] ★
If you thought “Dragonball Evolution” wasn’t bad enough, wait till you get a load of “Death Note”, Netflix’s very own disaster. Based on a popular Japanese manga series, this live-action version gets almost everything wrong, despite an intriguing premise. Nat Wolff seems clueless as Light Turner, a high-school kid who finds a mysterious notebook that…
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Transformers: The Last Knight [2017] ★
“What the fuck is happening?” I kept asking myself as I suffered through this mind-numbingly bad 4th sequel to 2007’s “Transformers”. I can’t remember the last time I felt the need to walk out of a movie, but for the sake of a genuine review, I stayed until the bitter end. The first movie, formulaic…
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Inconceivable [2017] ★
It’s only July, but Nicolas Cage has already been in two movies that rank among the worst of the year: First, “Arsenal” back in February, and now “Inconceivable”, a laughably bad thriller that recycles every shitty cliché in the book. Cage is reduced to supporting role, but that doesn’t mean that the movie gets better…
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