Shark Night [2011]

Just when you thought it was safe to turn on your TV again, here comes another horror movie featuring deadly sharks. But what can you say about a film that calls itself “Shark Night”, and yet takes place mostly during the day? Some viewers may have guilty pleasure on their minds, but truth be told: I’ve seen my share of guilty pleasures (last year’s “Piranha” is a fine example), and this ain’t one of them. Think of it as a lousy cross between “Jaws”, “Deep Blue Sea” and “Piranha”. You’ve got the familiar bunch of stereotypical college kids — including the dumb jock (Sinqua Walls), the sensitive intellectual (Dustin Milligan), the slutty girl, and the innocent princess with the complicated past (Sara Paxton). With people like that around, you don’t need a guide to figure out what happens when they all decide to spend a quiet weekend by the lake. David R. Ellis is a director who enjoys maximum gore in his films (see “Final Destination” and “Snakes On  a Plane”). Ironically, “Shark Night” can’t offer any. I mean the main reason any of us check out a movie called “Shark Night” would be to get some gruesome, ridiculous shark attacks, right? As long as the movie delivers in blood and guts, it’s reasonable to assume that you had a good time at the movies. Unfortunately, “Shark Night” is none of the above. Instead, it commits the cardinal movie sin: it’s dull. At one point, you might even find yourself screaming: eat them already, I’m bored!

Rating: 1.5/4